"I can't believe they're actually gone," B'Elanna Torres said, keying in the sequence to open the door to the Captain's quarters. "I mean, not two days ago I was sitting there having lunch with her."
"I know," her boyfriend replied sympathetically, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. Together, they stepped into the dark room. "Lights," Tom Paris commanded, and the room was immediately bathed in light.
"Why do we have to be the ones to do this though?" B'Elanna complained.
"Who would you rather have do it? Tuvok?" Tom shook his head. "We owe it to both the Captain and Chakotay, as their friends, to do this."
"I know, but it's just freaky having to go through all their stuff, knowing that they're never coming back."
"If it becomes too much for you, just let me know and I'll finish on my own," Tom offered.
"No, Chakotay would have wanted me to do this," she took a deep breath. "I just need a minute to get used to the idea."
"Tell you what, I'll start with the bedroom and you start in here," he suggested. "It'll be a little easier that way."
"Thanks," she smiled at her boyfriend.
"Call me if you need help," he said, disappearing into the other room.
With a sigh, B'Elanna looked around the room, trying to find a place to start. Finally, she decided on the desk, but as soon as she sat down, Tom called from the other room.
"You'll never believe this," he said, walking into the room, a book in his hand. "Apparently our resident perfect couple had a fight right before Chakotay left."
"Would you please stop calling them that," B'Elanna said, grabbing the book from his hand. "They were hardly the 'perfect couple.'" She paused as she realized just what she was looking at. "Tom, this is the Captain's diary."
"Yeah," he nodded, grabbing the book back. "Listen to this: 'Stardate 56940.4,' that's the day Chakotay..." he added, unable to finish the thought, then continued on. "'I'm afraid I said some things today that I probably shouldn't have. I was in an exceptionally confrontational mood, and Chakotay wasn't helping the situation any with his damn calm. It all started with his report on the Riens ...'"
* * *
Ten days earlier
"Chakotay, we were supposed to celebrate our anniversary tonight," Kathryn Janeway pleaded. "We've been putting it off for three weeks now."
"What was I supposed to say, Kathryn?" Chakotay replied, meeting his wife glare for glare. "'I'm sorry, Mr. President, but I already have plans for tonight. I'm afraid you'll have to reschedule your state dinner.' I'm sure that would have gone over well with the Riens."
"You didn't have to accept the invitation," she snapped.
"Oh, OK, I just negotiated a major treaty with these people, but I'm supposed to snub them when they want to celebrate the successful completion of the treaty," he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "Come on, Kathryn. You know as well as I do that we need their deuterium badly, and by not going to this dinner I'd be putting the whole trading mission in jeopardy."
"Fine, go," she said, sitting down in her chair and turning the computer screen back toward her. "Go and have a good time, Chakotay. It's obvious your devotion to duty is more important than your wife."
Chakotay stood there speechless, staring at her. "I cannot believe you just said that, Kathryn. You of all people have no right to be saying that. You, who haven't gone off duty at the end of your shift on time once since we got married. Miss Protocol-must-be-maintained-at-all-times."
"That was uncalled for, Commander," she hissed.
"Oh, so it's back to Commander now."
"Just get out," she snapped, pointing angrily toward the door. "And you can find somewhere else to sleep tonight, Commander."
"You can't kick me out of my own quarters, Kathryn."
"In case you forgot, Commander, those were originally my quarters, and I can kick you out if I want to."
"Damnit, Kathryn," he yelled, then abruptly stopped. His eyes closed and his hands balled into fists at his side as he tried to calm himself down. Taking a deep breath, and then another, he opened his eyes and looked over at her. "I really am sorry that I have to cancel our plans tonight, but it was unavoidable, and you know that as well as I do. You know full well that I would rather be up here with you than down there playing nice with a bunch of politicians. And you also know that I would take you with if I could, but the Riens only deal with the male of the species and so I cannot and will not put you in that position."
"Just go to your damn dinner and have fun, Chakotay." She turned her back to him. "In fact, I don't give a damn whether you ever decide to come back or not."
Deciding it was better not to grace that comment with an answer, Chakotay turned on his heel and stormed out of the ready room. What neither of them knew at the time, was that he was also walking right out of her life.
"Paris to Voyager, two to beam to Sickbay, NOW!"
Within seconds, two forms materialized on the floor of Sickbay. Without wasting a second, the EMH was at the pilot's side, scanning the prone body of Voyager's first officer. "What happened?" he demanded.
"The state dinner was stormed by terrorists," Tom explained, helping to lift Chakotay up onto the closest bio bed. "Chakotay dove in front of the Rien president, and was hit at close range with some sort of blaster fire."
"Tom," Chakotay rasped.
Startled, the blonde pilot turned to his commanding officer. "Shh, don't try to talk. Commander."
"No, promise me," Chakotay broke down into a coughing fit, blood trickling from the corner of his mouth. He waved off Tom's help, continuing on with what he was trying to say. "Promise me you'll tell Kathryn," he paused again, grimacing in pain. "Tell her ... I'm sorry," the last part was barely audible, and as soon as the words had been uttered, a loud monotone beep sounded as Chakotay's heartbeat went flatline.
The Doctor and Tom tried for several more minutes to revive their friend, but to no avail. "Computer," the EMH finally said, "record time of death for Commander Chakotay as 2134 hours on Stardate 56939.5."
Just as he'd finished saying that, the doors to Sickbay whooshed open, and Captain Janeway ran in. "Chakotay?" she questioned breathlessly.
"I'm sorry, Captain," the Doctor shook his head, motioning toward the commander's prone body laying on the bed.
"Oh God, Chakotay," she said, tears streaming down her cheeks as she ran over to the bio bed, throwing herself on top of his body. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean any of what I said. I'm so sorry. I love you, Chakotay."
"How is she doing?" Neelix asked, sitting down at the table with Harry Kim, Tom Paris, and B'Elanna Torres.
"Not good," Tom said, shaking his head.
"I still can't believe she's taking this so hard," Harry said. "I always thought the Captain was so much stronger than that."
"She's only human, Harry," Tom replied. "In fact, she has a history of depression."
"You didn't look at her file, did you, Tom?" B'Elanna frowned at her boyfriend.
"No," he shook his head. "But I knew her years ago through my father," he said, eyes serious. "When her father died, she refused to get out of bed for months on end, blaming herself for his death. But as far as I know, she was never this bad."
"The Doctor told me it's common for people to take the death of a loved one hard, but that he's never seen anyone take it this hard before," Neelix said.
Tom shook his head, "I've certainly never seen anyone this bad."
"Exactly how bad is it, Tom?" Harry asked. "You, the Doctor, and Commander Tuvok are the only people who've been in to see the Captain since all this started."
"This goes no farther than this table," Tom said, lowering his voice. Around him, his friends nodded. "Well, the Captain is hallucinating, and talking to herself. The Doctor has had her sedated much of the time to avoid her hurting herself."
"It's just all so sad," Neelix said.
"Commander, someone just opened an airlock on deck nine," Harry Kim announced.
"Can you determine who?" Tuvok asked, walking over to the operations station.
The ensign's hands flew over the keypad. "Whoever it was, they used the Captain's override code to open it," he replied finally.
"Computer, location of Captain Janeway," Tom said quickly from his place at the helm.
"Captain Janeway is not on board," came the reply.
"What was the last location of Captain Janeway?" Tuvok questioned.
"Deck nine, section fifteen alpha," the toneless voice of the computer said.
Around the bridge, eyes went wide in surprise.
* * *
"I can't believe she spaced herself because of a fight," B'Elanna stared at her boyfriend in shock.
"Weird, huh," he nodded. "You think any of those rumors are for real, though? The ones about seeing her wandering around deck nine near the airlock."
"Come on, Tom, you can't tell me you believe in ghosts," B'Elanna frowned at him in disgust. "She's dead, and there's nothing else to it."
"But we never did find her body."
"Tom, you know as well as I do that no one could survive in the vacuum of space without a spacesuit, and Tuvok accounted for all of them. She's dead, not walking around deck nine."
"I don't know, they say if you go down there late at night you can hear her calling for Chakotay and see her handprints on the wall."
"Tom, get over it, there is no such thing as ghosts. Now come on, we have to finish cleaning out their quarters."
The End?
Back to my homepage
Back to Voyager stories
e-mail me
