Song Rewrites

"Be-Bop-a-Kristin" (to the tune of "Be-Bop-a-Lula") Be-bop-a-Kristin, she's my baby Be-bop-a-Kristin, I don't mean maybe Chorus: Be-bop-a-Kristin, she's my baby Be-bop-a-Kristin, I don't mean maybe Be-bop-a-Kristin, she's my baby doll My baby doll, my baby doll She's the gal in the blue jumpsuit She's the queen of all the docs She's the one that I know She's the one that loves me so Chorus She's the one that's got the brains She's the one with the strong opinions She's the one that walks around the boat She's the one that yells "More science" Chorus
"Crockerland" (to the tune of "Dixie') I wish I was in the land of Crocker, Old men there are not forgotten, Look away! Look away! Look away! Crockerland. In Crockerland where I was born in, Early on one frosty mornin', Look away! Look away! Look away! Crockerland. I wish I was in the south, Hooray! Hooray! In Crockerland I'll take my stand To live and die in the south, Away, away, Away down south with Crocker! Away, away, Away down south with Crocker!
"Crocker's Theme" (to the tune of "Long Tall Texan" by the Beach Boys) Well I'm a big fat Texan I live in a big black sub (He lives underwater in a big black sub) Well I'm a big fat Texan I live in a big black sub (He lives underwater in a big black sub) Well people look at me and say Ooh wah ooh wah, is that your sub? (He lives underwater in a big black sub) Well I'm a big fat Texan I wear a seaQuest hat (He lives underwater with a seaQuest hat) Well I'm a big fat Texan I wear a seaQuest hat (He lives underwater with a seaQuest hat) Well people look at me and say Ooh wah ooh wah, is that your hat? (He lives underwater with a seaQuest hat) Well I was walkin' down the hall With my shiny gun My gun jinglin' down on my hip I seen a man a comin' Comin' with a gun And I just can't be beat Well I'm a big fat Texan I enforce justice for the law (He rides underwater to enforce justice for the law) Well I'm a big fat Texan I enforce justice for the law (He rides underwater to enforce justice for the law) Well people look at me and say Ooh wah ooh wah, well you're the law? (He rides underwater to enforce justice for the law)
"I Get Around" (to the tune of the song of the same name by the Beach Boys) 'Round 'round, get around, I get around Yeah get around, 'round 'round, I get around I get around 'round 'round, I get around Around town I get around 'round 'round, I get around I'm a real cool guy I get around 'round 'round, I get around I'm makin' real good friends I get around 'round 'round, I get around I'm gettin' bored sailin' up and down the same old seas I gotta find a new place where I can explore My buddies and me are gettin' real well known Yeah the bad guys know us and they leave us alone I get around 'round 'round, I get around Around town I get around 'round 'round, I get around I'm a real cool guy I get around 'round 'round, I get around I'm makin' real good friends I get around 'round 'round, I get around I get around Get around 'round 'round, ooh Wah wah ooh, wah wah ooh, wah wah ooh We always take my sub 'cause it's never been beat And we never missed yet with the girls we meet None of the guys are married 'cause it wouldn't be right To leave the best girls on the beach on the weekend I get around 'round 'round, I get around Around town I get around 'round 'round, I get around I'm a real cool guy I get around 'round 'round, I get around I'm makin' real good friends I get around 'round 'round, I get around I get around Get around 'round 'round, ooh Wah wah ooh, wah wah ooh, wah wah ooh 'Round 'round, get around, I get around (repeat out)
"Kristin" (to the tune of "Sheila") Sweet little Kristin You'll know her if you see her Blue eyes and a pony tail Cheeks are rosy She looks a little nosy Man this little girl is fine Never knew a girl Like my little Kristin Her name drives me insane Sweet little girl That's my little Kristin Man this little girl is fine Me and Kristin go for a swim Oh, oh, oh, feelin' funny inside Then little Kristin whispers in my ear Oh, oh, oh, I love you Kristin dear Kristin said she loved me Said she'll never leave me Our love will never die We're so doggone happy Just bein' 'round together Man this little girl is fine Never knew a girl Like my little Kristin Her name drives me insane Sweet little girl That's my little Kristin Man this little girl is fine Me and Kristin go for a swim Oh, oh, oh, feelin' funny inside Then little Kristin whispers in my ear Oh, oh, oh, I love you Kristin dear Kristin said she loved me Said she'll never leave me Our love will never die We're so doggone happy Just bein' 'round together Man this little girl is fine Oh, this little girl is fine
"Malcolm's Turn to Cry" (to the tune of "Judy's Turn to Cry" by Leslie Gore) Now it's Malcolm's turn to cry Malcolm's turn to cry Malcolm's turn to cry 'Cause Kristin's come back to me Oh, when Kristin left the boat to work with Malcolm And came back with him in tow I felt hurt and betrayed by both Now that was a foolish thing 'Cause now it's Malcolm's turn to cry Malcolm's turn to cry Malcolm's turn to cry 'Cause Kristin's come back to me Well it hurt me so to see them work together I felt like makin' a scene Then my tears just fell like raindrops 'Cause Malcolm just didn't see But now it's Malcolm's turn to cry Malcolm's turn to cry Malcolm's turn to cry 'Cause Kristin's come back to me One night I sat and talked it out with Kristin And she thought about it too Then she told Malcolm it's over 'Cause she still loved me that's why So now it's Malcolm's turn to cry Malcolm's turn to cry Malcolm's turn to cry 'Cause Kristin's come back to me Yeah now it's Malcolm's turn to cry Malcolm's turn to cry Malcolm's turn to cry 'Cause Kristin's come back to me
"The Ballad of Nate" (to the tune of "The Ballad of Jed" theme to the Beverly Hillbillies) (my sisters get partial credit for this one, inspired by the summer heat) Come and listen to my story 'bout a man named Nate Poor islander, barely kept his dolphin fed Then one day he was catchin' some rays And from nowhere came his friend the Admiral Noyce that is William Billy Well the next thing you know old Nate's a Captain 'gain The dolphin pod said "Nate move away from here, seaQuest DSV is the place you ought to be" So he packed up his launch and moved to the sub Marine that is Tin can Below the sea Well now it's time to say good-bye to Nate and all his crew They would like to thank you all for stoppin' by And you're all invited back again to their boat To give a hand in helpin' in a most important mission Military that is Shoot a terrorist Save a life Ya all come back now, ya hear
This last one is based on a pretty obscure song, so I'm including the original lyrics as well. And I'm not making this song up, it's a real song. "You Got What It Takes" (based on the song of the same name by Marv Johnson) You may drive a big fine sub But you don't look like a movie star And on your money we won't get far But baby you got what it takes To satisfy You got what it takes To set my soul on fire Wooha, oh yeah You got what it takes for me Now you may live in a beautiful place But you don't dress with the best of taste And nature didn't give you such a beautiful face But baby you got what it takes To satisfy You got what it takes To set my soul on fire Wooha, oh yeah You got what it takes for me Now when you're near me Ooh wee My head goes around and around And when you kiss me Oh yeah My love comes tumblin' down You send me Now you may live in a beautiful place But you don't dress with the best of taste And nature didn't give you such a beautiful face But baby you got what it takes To satisfy You got what it takes To set my soul on fire Wooha, oh yeah You got what it takes for me Now when you're near me Ooh wee My head goes around and around And when you kiss me Oh yeah My love comes tumblin' down You send me Now you may live in a beautiful place But you don't dress with the best of taste And nature didn't give you such a beautiful face But baby you got what it takes To satisfy You got what it takes To set my soul on fire Wooha, oh yeah You got what it takes for me         "You Got What It Takes" Marv Johnson You don't drive a big fine car You don't look like a movie star And on your money we won't get far But baby you got what it takes To satisfy You got what it takes To set my soul on fire Wooha, oh yeah You got what it takes for me Now you don't live in a beautiful place You don't dress with the best of taste And nature didn't give you such a beautiful face But baby you got what it takes To satisfy You got what it takes To set my soul on fire Wooha, oh yeah You got what it takes for me Now when you're near me Ooh wee My head goes around and around And when you kiss me Oh yeah My love comes tumblin' down You send me Now you don't live in a beautiful place You don't dress with the best of taste And nature didn't give you such a beautiful face But baby you got what it takes To satisfy You got what it takes To set my soul on fire Wooha, oh yeah You got what it takes for me Now when you're near me Ooh wee My head goes around and around And when you kiss me Oh yeah My love comes tumblin' down You send me Now you don't live in a beautiful place You don't dress with the best of taste And nature didn't give you such a beautiful face But baby you got what it takes To satisfy You got what it takes To set my soul on fire Wooha, oh yeah You got what it takes for me

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